8. Video Games

When we got married, Dave’s mom’s kindergarten friends all went in and got us a Nintendo Game System as our wedding gift. I would have to say that other than our coffee maker, this was one of our most well-appreciated wedding gifts. I personally had never really played video games until I got married but video games have become a very integral part of our history now.

Never Been Alone
Before I got married, I had never experienced living alone. I grew up the oldest in a five kid family so I knew that I never wanted to live alone. For the six years between living at home and getting married, I made sure I always had at least one roommate. I only went one year ever without having someone who was referred to as my boyfriend. Strangely I look back at that year as the best year of my life. I know it was difficult but very stimulating as well. Anyways, when I got married, I married a guy who works away, a guy who did live sound and was in a touring band. When you get married, you don’t usually live with other roommates. There is really an element of relief to that but if you’re married to someone who is never home, there is also no one to chitchat with before bed and there is no one to sip coffee with in the morning. It can make you feel panicky if you are like me. This is where Nintendo became an important part of my life. It was my new roommate, my new friend.

Divorce
Dave was home sometimes and we played video games together. This was mostly enjoyable. Sometimes our friends came over and we would all play Dr. Mario together when we weren’t watching Beverly Hills 90210 or Get A Life. There was a downside to playing video games with Dave though. He had been playing avidly for years. He has special skills with computers in general. And he was up against me, who never played before. We did have Atari when we were high school age but I never recalled liking it that much except for one day when I really got into Pac Man for the whole day and gave myself a blister on my thumb. I personally was not and never will be, even at my best moments, as good as Dave at videogames. I was just beginning at age 25. There was one game, Trog, that nearly gave us a divorce within our first year of marriage. This was a very head to head game and I felt very sorely that Dave was an insensitive, obnoxious, videogame hog. He creamed me mercilessly and I add this memory to my marriage pet peeves to this day.

Empty Nest
Despite the Trog incident, Nintendo was(is) a very good way to get through being alone. (Or together for that matter). When I had to deal with my first child going to school, my first empty nest problem, Dave got me a Game Boy for being brave and to take my mind off of thinking about how terribly I missed my beloved first son. I am not too thrilled by society, so socializing my son was never something I believed in strongly. Plus, what about bus accidents, mean teachers, getting lost, etc.? My new Wario game did help keep me distracted.

Good For Kids
I know a lot of parents disapprove of video games on a certain level. But if they are so great for Dave and I, then why not for the kids? My kids play the cute stuff, Marios and Kirbys and whatnot. They aren’t playing the ones Dave keeps hidden in his sock drawer. Neither do I for that matter. I think it’s a lot better for them than just straight tv because they are involved with something instead of just taking in people’s (lame) opinions. My kids take it farther playing pretend within the videogames that let you walk around in them, making up drawings and new characters, etc. They sing the music and analyze other music with video games as the reference point, “Did you hear that? It sounds like Paper Mario, Down In The Dungeon, Level 8.” My kids never have too much time on their hands. They always have too little.

Good For Your Mind
I think playing with computer games and computers in general gives you a sense of so many more levels of thought that you may not realize when you are not using them. I can remember strongly visiting my parent’s house and playing with my little brother’s Tetris down in their cellar and having epiphany after epiphany. It was like some sort of Zen, Buddhist, psychological, philosophical types of thoughts that you would never really imagine could come from playing video games unless you’ve really tried it.

They Can Be Addicting
A friend of ours came over one time when we first got married. We didn’t really know the deal with him, but he was, at the time, definitely on who knows, heroin, vicodin, methamphetamines, cough syrup? But he kept it to himself. It was a topic we only knew of in a hazy sort of way. We were pretty excited about the games. So we were showing him a game and he said, “I don’t know guys. I don’t play video games. They can be pretty addicting”. My thing is that I think we all need something to be addicted to but maybe some things are worse than others.

11/9/03